We took a walk around Temple Square today, which we hardly ever do even though we live so close. I love how these pictures capture just how much I love our boys, and how much they trust me and want to be close to me. I know that no matter how much I want time to slow down and my boys to stop growing so fast, this time with young children will still slip away. But the joy that I feel while I’m in the moment with my children will not fade with the years like the pictures and memories; it will become a part of me. It will become a part of them.
I love Iris Krasnow’s quote: “Being There [is] an emotional and spiritual shift, of succumbing to Being Where You Are When You Are, and Being There as much as possible. Its about crouching on the floor and getting delirious over the praying mantis your son just caught instead of perusing a fax or filling the dishwasher while he is yelling for your attention and you distractedly say over your shoulder: ‘Oh, honey, isn’t that a pretty bug.’ It’s about being attuned enough to notice when your kid’s eyes shine so you can make your eyes shine back.”
I want my boys to see my eyes shine when I play with them. I want to enjoy their play as much as they do. I want to “crouch down on the floor and get delirious” over the simple things that delight them. I want to be theirs while I can.
I’m working on making my eyes shine back and slowing down instead of stressing out about the myriad of “to dos” stretching out endlessly before me. You see, I like to get things done. I bulldoze my way through projects and feel that I can’t function ’til every piece of clutter is properly put in its place.
Life is meant to be enjoyed, not just bulldozed through, which I’ve been guilty of lately. I’ve got to slow down enough to give that to myself and to my family.